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Discussion: Would you date an escort?
Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 2,121
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Would you date an escort?
I saw this post on another forum  so this guy was dating someone, unaware that she was an escort but by the time he found out they were already in a serious relationship & he loved her so he stayed in the relationship 
 The post
Quote:
Hey there,
As I am writing this, my girlfriend is away in a hotel right now doing god knows what with any man who can pay what she charges, and it hurts so much.
We were quite deep into our relationship when I found out what she does in the worst possible way, when I came home one day to hear her in the bedroom with another man. I already had suspicions as to what she did and this just confirmed it.
Well, as much as you may judge me for it, i stayed with her, because I see the best in her, and I know she doesnt want to do it but she has been doing it for a few years ever since she moved to England from the Czech Republic and she feels financially dependent on it. We are both studying at uni as of September and so I cant see her stopping any time soon as she will need to support herself through her education.
Now I dont judge girls who choose to sell sex. Thats their choice and it is very rewarding finanically, but when a commited relationship is thrown into the mix, it obviously creates huge problems.
She does ensure her safety, including health related, and I enforce it by making sure she takes precautions when dealing with these guys shes going to sleep with, such as having an alarm with her, messaging me when she is safe, and being selective in who she chooses to see. She also doesnt do the worst things sexually, she always uses protection and doesnt kiss etc.
Emotionally, it wrecks me. To know that tons and tons of mainly older guys are using the girl i want to marry as nothing but sex makes me sick. I cant help but visualise what shes doing, and it torments me to think about it.
I guess its comparable to being cheated on every single day, just that money is exchanged, but to me it doesnt change the emotional impact of it.
Its also made me more protective and territorial. Its as if I have a public girlfriend, and so I try to ensure that when I'm with her, I feel like shes mine and im hers, because when your having to share your girlfriend every day it makes you question whether she is just your partner or a girlfriend for hire.
Sadly, there is nothing I can do to get her out of it atm, I dont have much money for as long as im a student and although she wants to stop, she wont make anything near what she makes now from working in a bar, although for me, id rather be poor as hell but still have each other over having material possessions and being cheated on every day.
Ive tried to ask for help in dealing with it on escort forums, but it just seems that a vast majority of escorts and punters have such deluded outlooks on relationships and sex, and they make out that I am unfair, possessive and wierd because I have a problem with my girlfriend getting screwed by other men 3 times a day. Well yes! I think it would be more of a problem if I didnt care at all, i mean seriously who the hell wouldnt find this difficult?? And i think i deserve credit for standing up and loving my partner where most other men couldnt, but instead they just criticise me.
And so I turn to here.
Has anybody else ever had a similar experience that they could share? How do I cope with this? I love her so much and dont want to leave her, but its so painful.
Thanks in advance.
J
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If this happened to you would you continue dating them or if someone told you straight up that they were an escort would you be fine with it?
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 1/3/2014
Posts: 11,976
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I'll escort them to the door.
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 9,990
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If they told me from the start I might think about it
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Member Since: 8/13/2012
Posts: 2,109
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If they told me yeah if anything I'd ask if we could become a duo lol
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 14,345
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If it was late into the relationship, I would probably break up with them. I wouldn't want something that big to be kept from me. It's better to bring it up earlier in the relationship so I'm fully aware of the circumstances.
EDIT - I found out what an escort is and it's not that bad. My opinion still goes for rentboys and stuff though.
EDIT - I found out what an escort is and it IS that bad.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 9,420
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 2,121
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so you guys wouldnt mind your partner sleeping with several other people in one day, every day
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Member Since: 8/13/2012
Posts: 2,109
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Quote:
Originally posted by biebervelli
so you guys wouldnt mind your partner sleeping with several other people in one day, every day
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That's not what an escort is sis
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 2,823
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Member Since: 12/3/2010
Posts: 14,971
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I totally respect escorts, in fact I admire their bravery, but I couldn't date one because I couldn't have my man sleeping with other people.
Quote:
Originally posted by May
If they told me yeah if anything I'd ask if we could become a duo lol
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 1,840
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No, I wouldn't date them and if I found out months down the line then I would leave them.
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Member Since: 8/13/2012
Posts: 2,109
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Just so y'all know there's a huge difference between escorts and prostitutes/rentboys. The latter are paid for sex, while escorts are paid for their time and company (dates, conversations, dinner parties) escorts can still have sex with their clients and some decide to do so but its not part of their deal at all and would be completely up to them. The reason people assume all escorts sleep w their clients is because the few times their stories are told in the media, it's one of them exposing a politician's weird kinks or something.
If I was in a relationship w someone I'd trust them not to decide to sleep with their clients. 
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Member Since: 8/6/2015
Posts: 8,372
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I'm clingy and that's such a time consuming job so probably not.
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Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 7,389
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100% no. No offense but that's not my cup of tea, at all.
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Member Since: 12/3/2010
Posts: 14,971
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Quote:
Originally posted by May
Just so y'all know there's a huge difference between escorts and prostitutes/rentboys. The latter are paid for sex, while escorts are paid for their time and company (dates, conversations, dinner parties) escorts can still have sex with their clients and some decide to do so but its not part of their deal at all and would be completely up to them.
If I was in a relationship w someone I'd trust them not to decide to sleep with their clients. |
That's very true but let's face it, many escorts do sleep with their clients and it's part of the deal all along.
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Member Since: 8/1/2012
Posts: 18,271
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Member Since: 11/26/2010
Posts: 14,197
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Member Since: 8/13/2012
Posts: 2,109
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Quote:
Originally posted by Miichael
That's very true but let's face it, many escorts do sleep with their clients and it's part of the deal all along.
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Some of them definitely do but it's less than what we think. We just think most of them do because the only time we hear about escorts is when one of them is exposing a politician's fetishes and whatever. We don't hear about the ones who don't have sex in the media because it's not controversial or exciting.
Not that I have anything against people saying 'no', y'all can date whoever you want!
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Member Since: 5/27/2016
Posts: 2,561
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I'm desperate so I probably would.
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Member Since: 8/7/2015
Posts: 11,858
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NO
Escorting is prostitution. People just don't want to associate the two things with each other.
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