Rihanna should be the next Bond. There should be five Bond movies — at least five Bond movies! — starring Rihanna, because every one of those movies could feasibly go as hard than the “Hard” music video, and thus be essential.
Some of you have concerns. I understand that. Let’s address the biggest one: Rihanna’s acting skills. Maybe you saw 2012’s Battleship, and maybe you felt some mixed feelings. Again, understandable. My counter is: James Bond has historically not been portrayed by legendary actors. Only one Bond, Sean Connery, has ever been nominated for an Oscar.
Perhaps you are also concerned that Rihanna is not British. Okay, who cares?
Finally, you are probably throwing your hands up at the idea of a Barbadian female taking over a beloved franchise that has always been headlined by white males. Oh, dear. Whatever will the general population do with only 24 James Bond films starring straight white dudes to consume? A different-looking Bond would probably cause Earth’s core to explode and mass human extinction, I guess! At the very least, assorted tables will be flipped over at varying speeds by Internet fanboys.
Rihanna’s state of coolness is amplified by the fact that it has little to do with her musical output. It’s been nearly three years since the release of her last album, Unapologetic, and in that time, her status as a fashion icon, in-demand spokesperson, savvy businesswoman and killer social media presence have all been underlined.