I was having an argument in a different forum and i'd like your opinions I Feel like when you hate on someone for behaving differently than their gender stereotypically does, it's the same as being homophobic, even if you are gay. The other persons argument is that being feminine is just a personality trait and its just a preference to a certain personality. That's such a cop-out miss america answer to me tho, what do you think!
Having a preference or not means you don't like something. Maybe I don't like someone's personality's traits but it's none of my goddamn business so I have no reason to hate on them.
Hating on anyone who's not doing something offensive is stupid. If a man wants to wear feminine clothing or act feminine who am I to say he can't do it? How is he affecting me in any way?
It has nothing to do with sexual orientation. You dont hate them because they are gays but because of their acting. Imho, feminine heterosexual guys exist as well
Homophobic would describe someone who either has a fear of or is against people who are homosexual.
It has nothing to do with behaviour.
right, but i feel like the hate/fear comes from the same place. Homophobes don't like gays because of the fear of someone who is nonconforming to gender stereotypes. People hate feminine men because of fear of someone who is nonconforming to gender stereotypes. So i find them to be correlated
It's not homophobic, everyone has their own preferences. Homophobic is bashing on them because of the way they are. I'm gay but personally i'm attracted to more masculine men, not so much feminine men. I have feminine gay friends but i'm not attracted to them persay.
also, i feel that when a gay person shames another gay for being feminine, for 'giving us a bad name' or whatever is not only homophobic, but trying to conform to what you think homophobes want from us. and why you would choose to try and appease to someone who will hate you anyways is beyond me
Personally, I just find it ignorant. If a person is "mac", "fem", or whatever, just let them be themselves. No need to bash someone for who they are(you do have a point!)
What he is describing is internalized homophobia which is a problem in the LGBT and he is right.
It's not just a personality trait that's going on.
Quote:
Originally posted by jose168
right, but i feel like the hate/fear comes from the same place. Homophobes don't like gays because of the fear of someone who is nonconforming to gender stereotypes. People hate feminine men because of fear of someone who is nonconforming to gender stereotypes. So i find them to be correlated
Quote:
homophobia
Line breaks: homo|pho¦bia
Pronunciation: /ˌhɒməˈfəʊbɪə , ˌhəʊmə-/
An extreme and irrational aversion to homosexuality and homosexual people.
Homophobia has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter if it comes from the same place, or whatever. Homophobia is still what it is.
It definitely originates from misogyny and that's inarguable so don't try unless you have receipts those relevant post-grad degree xoxo.
No. Masculinity in lesbians is also looked down upon. Take ATRL for example. When a female e.g Charice came out as a lesbian/those photos of her surfaced looking very masculine, people responded with disgust. It's the abnormality of seeing someone behave in the opposite sex. It's different, and things that are different usually get hate from humans. Be it different race or different cultures. Not much to do with misogyny.
Some of the hate directed at extremely masculine lesbians or extremely feminine gay men, is actually a form of gender discrimination. We need to take into account that gender expression is something that happens in conjunction with sexuality. Many people with non-traditional expressions, are experiencing the brunt of internalized homophobia and transphobia, even if they’re not trans.
Lots of straight people want to put sexuality in a box, but lots of straight and gay people want to put gender in a box. Gender, like sexuality, is a spectrum of expression. Some straight women are tough as nails and some butch lesbians are sweet as kittens and don’t know how to swing a hammer.
Some gay men are total meat heads, and others are skinny, gentle dreamers in makeup. None of this really matters. Hating on other gays is just another form of internalized homophobia with a terrible dose of transphobia thrown in.
The best way to overcome internalized homophobia is to first realize it’s an issue worth dealing with. If you aren’t out, there’s a good place to start. But if you are, then it’s a matter of education, acceptance, and seeing beauty in our differences (including your own).
I Feel like when you hate on someone for behaving differently than their gender stereotypically does, it's the same as being homophobic, even if you are gay. The other persons argument is that being feminine is just a personality trait and its just a preference to a certain personality. That's such a cop-out miss america answer to me tho, what do you think!
