I deleted all Gaga music on all my devices only listen to her on youtube
I made sure not to be seen in public and Facebook with any fem gays
Calling people gay when I'm with my str8 friends
Call people ****, date girls, take viagra with me to house parties in case a girl wanted to sleep with me, leave straight **** in the browser history in hope my parents would find it and know that I wasn't gay. I even had a long conversation with my mum's ex about how gay people are disgusting because of what the Bible said, a mess.
Call people ****, date girls, take viagra with me to house parties in case a girl wanted to sleep with me, leave straight **** in the browser history in hope my parents would find it and know that I wasn't gay. I even had a long conversation with my mum's ex about how gay people are disgusting because of what the Bible said, a mess.
Basically a lot to convince people I was straight
a mess
I did date this girl but we are never *official* although she kept sending me gifts and poems and stuff. i broke up with her through her friend on the last day of school. im still shocked i actually pulled it off
projected my internalized homophobia onto anything associated with queerness
in hopes that it would help me fit in and avoid being bullied by other internally homophobic males
subscribed to a treacherously misogynistic way of thinking where I began to view women as nothing more than toys for sexual pleasure and refused to wear or listen to things that I felt were "too gay"
it's funny what society will do to your sense of identity when you don't fit the norm
I wasn't ever really in the closet. People asked and I was just like "maybe" because I used to not like people. And I didn't want them talking to me. But they did.