Member Since: 10/19/2010
Posts: 1,428
|
Americana: The Invasions (NOW: #65-#61)
Let me first introduce myself. My name is Pocahontas, the REAL princess of America and a Disney icon. Leaked-iT, he's not here. but he asked me to take over this thread to teach this fellow ATRL-ers a lesson, a lesson about America. Some people maybe doesn't even know me. I came down from the holy place to the world of the internet where people don't even see each other faces (Ouhh. What is that? This is actually kinda fun.) so that's why I put a picture of myself above and for my voice, imagine having Taylor Swift's sweet voice with Gwen Stefani swag (I ain't no hollaback gurrlll .) This people actually have cool music. In my time, it was just the wolves' cries and a desperate housewife singing about the wind colors.
Now let's get serious again, we live in the country where baseballs and apple pie are the symbols that re-present our beautiful country. You think it's all perfect but it could all be ruined in a matter of seconds. By whom, you asked? This is when the invasions come. In my time it was the Englishman searching for territory. And now it's Europeans and Australasians coming for Americans wigs to be at the top of the Billboard charts. I cannot let this happen. You may ask why me to be the leader of this. Well first of all the history books got it wrong because you don't know that I slept with George Washington great great grandfather and gave birth to a baby boy. So without me there wouldn't be any America, we might be all just citizens of Panem. Enough of this chit-chat if that is what you call it, let me introduce the American team:
Let's start from the far left, Miss Jessie Malakouti or known as the front-woman of Jessie And The Toy Boys. This Californian girl gonna make you show her your tan lines and teach you how to REALLY do the laundry. Next to her is Christina Perri, you might already heard her in the radio even though I'm not sure what it is. I heard it's a box where you can listen to music with. Whatever it is she sure have gotten some attention from it. The middle one that's Grace Potter, she the one that probably represent America the best. Brunette beauty, soulful voice, nice boobs and not afraid to show it. She knows The Truth Tea. She's not that big yet but she does have a country hit if that counts. Then we have Wynter Gordon, the only black soloist in the list. I'm very proud of this girl. She is totally not local, she already have some hits down under. This girl knows how to invade!!! The last one to re-present this country is umm.... DEV. It's not my fault, her label 'ask' me (fixs bra) to include her. but hey she had a Plantinum hit so why not. So that concludes the American team. Now I...... wait.....wait....I'm losing my signal!!!!
Hahaha. That's not a mentor. I am. They didn't call me Scary Spice for nothing. And the American line-up. my girls can fart and still make better hits than them. The European invasion have already started and this basic bitches ainnnn't ready. So let me introduce them to you:
From the left, that's Niki And The Dove headed by Malin Dahlström. Thats maybe a weird name but Uhhhh this girl knows how to rite a sonngg, baby. DJ you can totally ease my mind with this. Next to her is Birdy, she may not be a bird but she do sound like one. The youngest from the pack at only sixteen, have some hits in her album, even though it's not totally hers. but still this damn girl know how to cover it. The middle one, is a late addition to our pack. They may not have a lot of songs but 'I Love it' alone will kill the list. They are Icona Pop by the way from Sweden. The next girl is a Perfectionist and god-Peter Pan ate my cracker-damn her album perfect. I was grooving to it all summer long. It's Natalia Kills. And the last one was a hard bargain to get, she probably have a bigger stan base than me in ATRL and that's why. I'm not complaining, I know I have been irrelevant since Spice Girls broke up. And I'm not afraid to admit it. My album ain't Hot in any state of mind. You see what I did there, Hot and State Of Mind and it's available on iTunes and umm okay. So yeah Marina, the Primadonna girl who knows hot to ride Dr. Luke's **** to get a hit. So that sum it up and don't forget to catch me .... with the Stars ...... X Factor.
I need to stop her. She can go on and on about herself. I don't do that ****. And the only thing you need to know about me is, I'm a veteran boxer and been sent by the government to handle this thing. And I know without a DOUBT!!! an Australasian will win this. let me introduce them to you.
First is Zowie, a New Zealander that is obsess with machines, calculators and softwares. but somehow manage to turn them into a song that's good. And Katy Perry must agree too or not she wouldn't want to had a concert with her. Next to her, is one of the two people in this rate that already have a No. 1 hit. Her name is Kimbra and yeah she is that naked girl in Somebody That I Used To Know. I hope the name of the song does't indicate something. Next is Sia. The girl is rising up the chart this year with Wild One and Titanium, too bad it's not hers. At 36, even though she's the oldest of the crowd, her career had just started. better late than never. And the last one is a hot new rapper, Iggy Azalea that need to introduction here in ATRL. So that's it. We are ready to invade!!!!
|
|
|