This ornament keeps tweeting at 3 a.m., demanding apologies from the casts of various Broadway musicals. For what, I don't know. You'd think now that the Christmas season has officially arrived, the tree is up, and the stockings are hung, this ornament would finally get serious about being an ornament and doing the things an ornament ought to do--you know, stuff like hanging on the tree, looking merry and bright, and not destroying the Republic in its quest to satiate an unquenchable thirst for power. But no such luck. It just keeps tweeting and tweeting and tweeting. I'm not even sure how it manages to use a phone for such time-wasting endeavors, given how microscopic its teeny-tiny, wee little hands are.
Very strange. I'd like to return this, but I hear it will take an act of Congress to do so, and in any case, I'm not sure the backup ornament I'm stuck with is any better. It keeps trying to electrocute me.