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Tournament: PLATINUM HIT 8
Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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All my comments have been positive so I better be above my placement last round
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Member Since: 1/2/2014
Posts: 476
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Originally posted by GotSkill
18. BlueM – Loud, Rihanna
This felt a bit more Unapologetic or Talk That Talk, but I guess it could also work as an S&M sequel. The first verse was a bit rocky and struggled to find a good flow, but you caught yourself by the chorus. The sexual tension in the chorus and the almost explicit description was fantastic in my opinion. I just wish you had been able to carry that throughout the song.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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lovesong's comments are coming now. Meowster couldn't leave comments. I'll post Huga's comments in the morning when he sends me his B2 comments, unless he wants to post them himself again.
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 12/2/2010
Posts: 17,916
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Quote:
26. URBAN – Fortune, Chris Brown
This song wasn’t bad, but there was nothing particularly striking about it either. The language was all very familiar, and while it fit Chris pretty well, I wish I could have seen a little more of your own style here. There were no major technical errors here, so I commend you on that.
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Thank you Gotskill.
I guess I got too caught up in the Breezy mentality lol. I'll keep that in mind for other similar challenges if I stick around!
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by Sam
lovesong's comments are coming now. Meowster couldn't leave comments. I'll post Huga's comments in the morning when he sends me his B2 comments, unless he wants to post them himself again.
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Thank you judges!
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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lovesong's Comments
Batch 1
Quote:
1. Girlicious – The New Classic, Iggy Azalea
Well I was definitely getting the Iggy vibes! I liked some key lines here, the "Get on your knees" jab for example and I think you did a great job of capturing Iggy. It's great that you went with a bolder option of doing a rap track and I think you did a nice job with that risk. Following a rap flow can be difficult, maybe even more than a regular song and at times I felt like you might have benefitted from omitting certain words that made the lines longer or clunkier. I guess in the verses it was hard to follow along at times because of the flow issue.
2. conatus – Yours Truly, Ariana Grande
I was surprised at how simple and straightforward this song was from you, not that that is a bad thing – I definitely see it working to your advantage here. The pre-choruses had me literally stanning, I would love to hear this song in real life, be it on Yours Truly or even for Ariana's next album, and the entire time I was reading it I could hear her voice singing it to me (). Basically on a challenge level, you nailed it. In terms of writing I was a little less convinced at first, but I appreciate that you tried to incorporate elements of your own style with Ariana’s and I think you did a good job.
3. inuborg – Riot!, Paramore
Yasss. You did a nice job of getting the feel of Paramore as a band in this song, it was straightforward but had the right amount of edge to emulate them well. I like the chorus especially because it felt like a sharp little punch and really elevated everything. There were a couple of lines here and there that felt a bit awkward ("We’re all just clocks just tick ticking away") but that's minor/personal thoughts at this point. Nice touch to have the variant chorus at the end!
4. jpow – Prism, Katy Perry
It definitely sounds like the latter half of Prism or even the bonus tracks in its style and approach. Overall it's not bad but I was hoping for something a bit more unique or something more... Katy I guess. The verses were nice, I like that they were more concise and the flow of them was really cool. The chorus was okay, they felt a bit poem-y to me (shade?  ) but I think that there was definitely room to really think outside of the box there.
5. Nait Phoenix – Unapologetic, Rihanna
I was thinking this would be a Pour It Up-esque #ClapBack anthem but it is interesting that you went with one of the more solemn ballads (ex. Stay). Or at least, so I thought until I heard the audio  . I do like the style that you went for with the song on a personal level, and lyrically it definitely has strong moments. However, I am not so sure that this worked the best with Unapologetic, and ultimately for this challenge.
6. Jaxswim – Beauty Behind the Madness, The Weeknd
It’s a really cool approach and I like the song lyrically. High points to me were your verses, they had some cool imagery and the rhyming was very natural. I was a bit turned off from your chorus, I thought the rhyming there felt a bit too repetitive while I think you could have gone for something more innovative there. I was also a bit unsure of how it fits with the album, not to pigeon-hole The Weeknd but he has a very signature dark style (which really came through in that album, personal thoughts aside), I wasn’t so sure that you really got that in this song.
7. Kunst – Badlands, Halsey
Disclaimer I hadn’t listened to this album but for judging I tried to listen to a few tracks. I am one of those people that are not here for Halsey, but I promise that didn’t come into my score at all.
I like what you did especially with choice lines like “drunk skyscrapers” and basically everything in your chorus absolutely fitting the album while actually feeling more natural in your song. I thought overall you did a pretty good job but there were a couple of cliché bits here and there in the verses. On the good side, you really captured Halsey and managed this challenge well.
8. ausdaniel – 1000 Forms of Fear, Sia
Well I assume that this is what Sia lyrics read like but I can’t always tell what she’s singing (). Okay shade aside, I like the verses. You did a good job of framing them and I like how your rhymes work, but aren’t necessarily so obvious. I was less convinced with the chorus personally, I felt like it was a bit too simple and too repetitive. Dialing that back a bit might have helped the song a lot. You did however manage Sia’s album really well and I could see this fitting nicely.
9. Dylobs – In The Zone, Britney Spears
I love that you emulated the sensual songs from that album (Breathe On Me/Touch Of My Hand/Early Morning) since they’re the best ones. Some of the lines were really good (the garden allusions) and that little “in sync” bit was genius. However there were several awkward lines as well, (“dog a bone” / “wrecks the house”). It was a balancing act of sorts.
10. JakeKills – 1989, Taylor Swift
Eh… I was honestly kind of disappointed with this one. It’s got to be tough doing a number titled song and making it unique so I appreciate you going for a risk but I was unconvinced. It just felt very cliché; the referencing of her song titles for example was just cringe worthy for me. I do like some key lines “rose with thorns” and “fragile flame”. What I think would have been more effective is if you had actually focused on interpreting Taylor’s lyrical quirks and 1989’s imagery rather than take it too literal.
11. EuphorianSea – Blackout, Britney Spears
The chorus nailed the feeling of Blackout while still keeping your own writing style intact. The momentum was nice, it had that darkish dance pop vibe going all the way through. The bridge had me thinking of a classic Britney whisper too. Basically it felt like a long-lost Blackout cut, great job!
12. ceremonials – Ceremonials, Florence and the Machine
From the first few lines I knew that you had Ceremonials’ imagery and feeling captured. Thankfully, you kept up that momentum the whole way through. The chorus was… perfect. The second half of the chorus especially was just brilliant. Maybe it was a bit too literal at times with its imagery but with practice and more experimentation I think you’ll find the right balance.
13. Vulnicura – In Colour, Jamie xx
At first I was confused since In Colour is more reliant on its production rather than its lyrics but as I read it I got what you were going for a bit better. Your imagery was nailed down perfectly, both creative yet not contrived. It’s a bit on the minimal approach but I imagine with the right instrumental backing it, it would sound great. Worked well for the album despite the potential challenges that choosing it could have incurred.
14. Obsession – True Romance, Charli XCX
I kind of liked a few bits here and there and I think you did a cool job of experimenting with some of the word choice and imagery. I was less convinced that it would work with the album though. One of the best things about True Romance is how Charli captured romance and relationships in a completely different way – it was both accessible and relatable yet still kind of innovative. I wasn’t so sure you were able to capture that feeling with this song. I also felt that there were some awkward lines that just stood out in the wrong way – (“Crying out with its all” / “Death has cast you for a role”).
15. Nightingale – Emancipation, Mariah Carey
I was so perched and ready for you to capture the imaginative and lush imagery that Mariah uses in her songwriting. Instead I felt like you glossed over the imagery and instead focused on making the word “emancipation” work. Your language was okay at times but also kind of overly complex and clunky at other times, so it’s kind of a fine balance. I do like the way you touched upon some personal topics in Mariah’s life and I think that would be a good way to approach the title track to this album but I was hoping for a bit more.
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Have a fun and safe Halloween everyone! I'll be staying home with mommy watchung movies all day so I don't have to worry about people trying to give me ecstasy!
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
2. conatus – Yours Truly, Ariana Grande
but I appreciate that you tried to incorporate elements of your own style with Ariana’s and I think you did a good job.
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Thank you but I'm really curious to see which parts of the song you thought were more stylistically me than Ariana. 
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Member Since: 7/15/2012
Posts: 30,915
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Quote:
Originally posted by swiftie13
Have a fun and safe Halloween everyone! I'll be staying home with mommy watchung movies all day so I don't have to worry about people trying to give me ecstasy!
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Whoever told you free ecstasy is bad is WRONG!
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Quote:
Originally posted by keshaspearsxo
Whoever told you free ecstasy is bad is WRONG!
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 12/2/2010
Posts: 17,916
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Quote:
Originally posted by conatus
Thank you but I'm really curious to see which parts of the song you thought were more stylistically me than Ariana. |
I LOVE your AVI!!! I'm BO$$Y! 
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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lovesong's Comments
Batch 2
Quote:
16. 8thPrince – News of the World, Queen
Disclaimer 2 this is the second album that I was unfamiliar with so I listened to a few songs. Let me start by applauding you for going for the risky choice here. The lyrics you have are more simple and straightforward yet also sort of unconventional. I definitely see the way it fits well with the big, anthemic, victory songs that are on that album. It was a little uninteresting to me, but maybe only because you usually have a very signature style and this one kind of compromised that.
17. Buyonce1814 – Unorthodox Jukebox, Bruno Mars
nn okay so I kind of hate this style of music lately. It actually gave me Uptown Funk! teas which is interesting, but that does work with the album so that’s fine. It was a bit cliché at times (“MJ Thriller” / “like I’m Cupid”), I know that he does reference icons and name-drops in his songs sometimes but I didn’t like it in your song. The chorus however was a strong part, it fit the theme well and the jukebox/unorthodox was great. I think the chorus/post-chorus was fun and Bruno is probably working on a song that sounds like it as we speak.
18. BlueM – Loud, Rihanna
Parts of the song fit the album well while others not so much. The chorus for example, was really aligned nicely especially with that bold and powerful final line. However, some of the verses were kind of out-there to the point where it actually changed the tone of the song. They were a bit… animalistic? And I also felt a few lines didn’t make sense so make sure you review word choice and syntax.
19. MattyTacos – Daydream, Mariah Carey
This was a good attempt at Mariah and I was totally getting The Wind teas! I appreciate how you’ve changed your styles according to each challenge but still feel uniquely you. The lyrics here are really beautiful, nicely painted with imagery and the meter and structure is very tight. I wasn’t absolutely sold on it fitting with the particular album, it does but then it doesn’t (hard to explain) but it’s a strong song anyway.
20. swiftie13 – Confessions on a Dance Floor, Madonna
Yet again, you have nailed the challenge and the round. Your writing has a level of sophistication to it where reading it just feels… right. You captured the album really well but still had enough of your own personal style to support it. I think the chorus is actually brilliant and I like that you put yourself in Madonna (especially Madonna in 2005) her shoes and picked up on personal stories. I could do without the overuse of religious imagery though, and that last line was kind of corny dd.
21. Jack! – I Am…, Beyoncé
There were some nice moments in this, I like the inspirational feel to it and I thought that it had a great chorus. It was kind of like a #Revival song, picturing it for a comeback entry and I think it would have slayed. For Beyoncé’s album… I wasn’t so convinced. Now I know that I Am… is kind of a floaty concept at times, which is why your interpretation might differ from mine, but the thing that I felt was that this didn’t capture the soft-spoken, romantic feel of the other songs. It focused too much on being an introduction of “Beyoncé“ when it probably would have been more effective showing Beyoncé through the actual lyricism. (Feel free to PM me or something if you need more clarification nn).
22. Tymps. – Frank, Amy Winehouse
Yasss. Really captured the album well, from the imagery to the lyrical tricks it was all perfect. This was a good way to do the name-dropping effectively without letting it overwhelm your song and compromise the quality. I could hear her singing this the whole way through. Honestly, this is the best entry you’ve submitted so far and one of the best this week.
23. keshaspearsxo – Plus, Ed Sheeran
Oh this is a cute entry! I liked the hook and bridge a lot and it really fits the album well. I also like the verses, especially the second one for its lyrics. I do have a few critiques mainly in the first verse, which felt kind of bland to me, with unimaginative rhymes. It really picked up as it progressed though. I think you got Ed’s earlier style nicely.
24. Element – Night Visions, Imagine Dragons
Disclaimer 3 I haven’t heard this album either but I am familiar with some of the singles. I think you got the concept to the album down pact, its got the energetic rock vibe of Imagine Dragons, but it still holds up on its own and doesn’t get lost in their image. I like this as a comeback from last week, it has great concise lines, the structure is good, and it captured the challenge’s criteria well.
25. ClarksonSlays – Brand New Eyes, Paramore
Disclaimer 4 I haven’t heard this album and listened to a few tracks before judging (the little intro was helpful!). So I like this song, it has great lines as usual and it captures you and your style well. Maybe too well . It was a bit you, and not enough them. I wanted to see it fit the album a bit more to really make me feel like it belonged as a title track.
26. Urban_Fan – Fortune, Chris Brown
Disclaimer 5 another album I haven’t heard, I listened to a few tracks and I assure you my Chris Brown distaste did not come into play. You kind of got it. I was really getting the Chris Brown teas, and the structure of the song was so tight it felt really focused and flowed nicely. I wasn’t sure if this was more of a ballad but I think it would work really nicely as a low-key dancey chill song.
27. TheCheetahwings – Multiply, Ed Sheeran
Before I read each entry I get in the mood of the album, and in doing so with this one I really heard Ed singing (well sing-rapping or whatever he does). I think you captured the rhythmic style of some of his songs nicely. What I was hoping for a bit more was the actual content to really fit the feel of the album. I think there was room to push it towards that a bit more even if a few lines felt like they worked. I also thought the chorus was a bit on the weak side, maybe too repetitive?
28. HausofNiko – Pure Heroine, Lorde
This… did not fit the album at all. I was hoping for a really cool song about the complexities of growing up as a teenager in this day and age but what I got was a dark, almost sex-fueled anthem. The bridge kind of touched upon some of Lorde’s themes but as a whole it wasn’t able to capture the challenge criteria. I do think that in terms of lyrics you have some strong lines, and I like that you experimented a bit with the concept which was kind of cool. I think that you just got a bit mixed up with the meaning of the song and that unfortunately compromised things for me.
29. Moonchild – Living Proof, Cher
Disclaimer 6 Haven’t heard this album, but I listened to a few songs to get a feel for it. I like the concise nature of this song (and as an aside I like that a lot of people went with a more concise approach). You are really great at having tight meter/structure, it helps the reader nicely and makes your songs feel more rhythmic and natural. The chorus was very Cher from what I gather and overall it had a cool feel to it.
30. Kworb – Dead Petz, Miley Cyrus
What a risk! You definitely went with something unique and I am so appreciative of that. You also captured Miley her spacey thoughts nicely and turned them into something poetic and brilliant. It’s almost too well focused to appear on that album now that I think about it! But no, this was very strong and you kept it in line with the emotional content of her album.
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Member Since: 9/15/2012
Posts: 22,487
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Member Since: 1/1/2014
Posts: 57,339
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Quote:
Originally posted by URBAN
I LOVE your AVI!!! I'm BO$$Y! |
Legend K. 
  
My iconic trinity of Kelis avis >>>
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 12/2/2010
Posts: 17,916
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Quote:
26. URBAN – Fortune, Chris Brown
Disclaimer 5 another album I haven’t heard, I listened to a few tracks and I assure you my Chris Brown distaste did not come into play. You kind of got it. I was really getting the Chris Brown teas, and the structure of the song was so tight it felt really focused and flowed nicely. I wasn’t sure if this was more of a ballad but I think it would work really nicely as a low-key dancey chill song.
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Thanks Lovesong!
If you got a chance to hear "Don't Judge Me", that's the sound I was going for. 
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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Thanks lovesong  however my last line >>>>>>
Madonna sort of used it to end her Confessions tour
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 12/2/2010
Posts: 17,916
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Quote:
Originally posted by conatus
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One of my ALL time favorite Kelis songs. Lemme BUMP that album right now actually! 
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Member Since: 1/13/2012
Posts: 13,577
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This avatar
Erotic, erotic...
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 8/19/2013
Posts: 56,234
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Just put all of the data I currently have into Excel and took a look at the building rankings. 
I wonder if my scores + Huga's Batch 2 scores will change much?
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ATRL Contributor
Member Since: 4/3/2014
Posts: 18,319
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When are hugas comments coming?
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